You’re all a bunch of weirdos, seriously.
My buddies Tish and Bucky have recently published lists of rather amusing keywords their visitors have used to land on their blogs. Some of them are quite perverted, others are just freakin’ funny. In the spirit of silliness, I thought it would be fun to take a look at some of the Google searches which have led visitors to my site. If you’re reading this and found your way to my site using one of these keywords, no offense, this is just for giggles :) The following keywords were used to find this blog. In later posts I’ll look at keywords used to find the Gummy site and BlogsWeLuv.
- calzones leak (Well yeh, they do, but if you follow my calzone recipe there’s less chance of leakage. Honest)
- the best 4 wheeler in the world (I have no idea?)
- one nostril (Why not two?)
- can bad teeth make u sick and shake (Why yes, they can.)
- intestines gurgling in public (Mmmmm)
- jim davis doesn’t draw garfield (Technically no since he has a team of artists now, but he did create Garfield so there’s probably a good chance he did indeed draw Garfield.)
- i peed on the floor (Thanks for the warning.)
- cartoon pimp (That would be me :mrgreen:)
- i cant breathe what should i do (Call 911!)
- revenge for loud car stereos (Mwahaha. I like how this person thinks.)
- can’t breathe out of one nostril (Try using the other one.)
For more silliness, check out Gary Conn’s Top ten Google keyword blunders. Garry also has some great links to other folk’s posts about Google keyword weirdness.
Popularity: 4% [?]
Looks like you've never been here before! Today is your lucky day. For just the price of a simple mouse click, you can subscribe to this blog's RSS feed!
October 1st, 2007 at 2:09 pm
HAHA, that’s great!
Gurgling intestines, and peeing on the floor. Great stuff man. :)
October 1st, 2007 at 2:19 pm
LOL…This could easily become a weekly thing ;P
October 1st, 2007 at 4:17 pm
“i cant breathe what should i do”
Now that’s a true internet/google fan, he’d rather find the answer online than been told by some chick on the telephone, who’s probably fat but the hot voice makes you picture her differently… eeeehm o.O 991 yeah !
October 1st, 2007 at 4:25 pm
wow I typed 991 instead of 911, see when you get all exited, scared or chocked, you will impossibly remember 911, instead trying all other combinations, 991 919 199 119 911, they should change it to 007 instead.
:P
anyway you aren’t getting traffic for the search term “cum shot” which I get traffic for, for some strange and perverted reason.
ps. well now you will :P
October 1st, 2007 at 5:55 pm
That’s hilarious! I hope everyone does one of these. Haha!
October 1st, 2007 at 5:57 pm
Lol, classic stuff! I’ve run a couple of blogs in the past and found the same kind of odd search traffic. Sometimes just random weird stuff like you have above, other times sick pervert stuff. Really weird.
October 1st, 2007 at 6:05 pm
I get some pretty weird ones too. The strangest are the ones like “how do I get free money on the internet?”. Seriously, who searches for this kind of stuff without expecting to be ripped off?
At least people like John Chow can rest easy at night knowing that there are suckers like that out there.
October 1st, 2007 at 10:10 pm
Okay, that’s just plain weird, yet it inspires me to do a little research of my own with my blogs.
October 2nd, 2007 at 12:42 am
Reading your article on site words - saw ” cartoon pimp ” was listed - knew this was fate . I write for Yirmumah.com - free online comic 10 years running . We fear no walls and respect the ha - ha . Please feel free to check it out - http://yirmumah.com
October 2nd, 2007 at 1:09 am
@krillz: That’s just nasty ;P I’ll have to check my log files in a couple weeks and see if I’m now attracting those perverts here thanks to you…lol.
@Christy: When should we be expecting yours? :P
@Randy: I hear ya. It never ceases to amaze me :)
@Chase: LOL…They may as well just search for “help me get scammed out of everything I own” ;)
@Mark: Weird yes, but you know you giggled :)
@Bob: Hey Bob! I’ve actually been to your site several times in the past. I was always impressed with the artwork and layout. 10 years is a heck of an accomplishment. My comic is barely over a half year old. Would certainly love to pick your brain some day on a myriad of topics ;)
October 2nd, 2007 at 4:36 am
Hi, this is the first comment on this site. Really this is funny because i never knew that we will be listed in the odd traffic if we are writing with some weird keywords. Any way, how could you find that you are getting traffic from odd keywords?
October 2nd, 2007 at 4:49 am
Hehe funny stuff :P
October 2nd, 2007 at 8:20 am
Hi Mike,
I’m doing a tour of all the bloggers listed on Santa’s Christmas Meme and then adding them to Technorati Favs.
re: search terms - bushisms battle cedar. How the heck they got to mine is beyond me, but then I guess Bush is a bit wooden, so that could be the link to cedar :)
October 2nd, 2007 at 1:00 pm
@Malin: You can always count on Google for a little humor :)
@Colin: LOL…wooden may even be a bit of an understatement ;)
October 2nd, 2007 at 3:14 pm
Heh that’s a pretty good list. Did you see if you ranked good for those terms too? Might be untapped money there haha.
October 2nd, 2007 at 4:17 pm
LOL…you’re right. Perhaps I could score a deal with an advertiser selling breathe right nasal strips or something :mrgreen:
October 2nd, 2007 at 4:25 pm
mike, no there’s more money to be made from the “I peed on the floor” removal kit. :P
October 3rd, 2007 at 1:32 am
Considering the alarming number of babies born every day on this planet, you may be right ;)
October 3rd, 2007 at 10:41 am
hahaha!!
My favorite “I peed on the floor.”
October 3rd, 2007 at 10:13 pm
Those are hilarious! How do you go about finding these things? (Sorry, I’m new to blogging.)
October 3rd, 2007 at 11:00 pm
I use a service called StatCounter which keeps track of everything for me. They have a great little thingy called keyword analysis where you can see which search terms people use to find your site =)
October 4th, 2007 at 9:29 pm
Thanks for the information Mike. I will check that out =)
October 14th, 2007 at 11:13 pm
[...] Oct, 14th - Mike Wheeler’s Fun With Google [...]