The kamikaze fly
So there’s this fly that’s managed to sneak his way in here somehow. Not just your average fly either. A rather large, juicy looking thing with a buzz as loud as a small motor boat. He seems to be taking pleasure in dive bombing at me when I least expect it. I was sitting here a bit ago munching away on some chicken nuggets when out of nowhere the juicy fly is looking me square in the eyes. I of course flailed my arms at it like a frightened little school girl. Kamikaze fly fluttered off but promptly returned, this time making a play at my nuggets. I managed to thwart his attempt before he was able to land and rub his grubby little feet all over them, but it was a rather close call. As you can imagine I’m more than just a little bit irritated.
So, how was your day?
SAVE THE NUGGETS!!! O_O!!!
The fly could have at least wiped his feet off before he came in! How rude!
My day was great! I have been working on trying to optimize the website at work, and I was throwing some ideas around with my boss and I think he was pretty impressed with knowledgeable lil old me! I had a falafel for lunch and a pretty fly free day. I went for a scooter ride, and I am going to go the store to get some Diet Coke before I settle into a lovely night of blogging.
BTW I wonder how many times I say the word Diet Coke in a week? And I wonder how many times I say the words blog or blogging in a day? Too many!!!
Did someone say diet coke??? After coffee that’s my favorite thing in the world. Hey Danielle in the U.S. they say soda instead of pop. Freaky.
OK Mike you are now up to 382 (covers eyes). I can’t watch! LoL. I’m going to bed, you’ll probably be an A lister by morning….I hope you’ll remember me…
ROFL :)
@Danielle: Fortunately I finished the nuggets before the fly could return. I still wonder where it is right now though :-o
Perhaps tomorrow you should start a tally of how many times you say Diet Coke ;P
@Christy: I’m in the top 10k! I still remember you :P
@Mike – I can’t really blame the fly though – if I flew in through a window I would have immediately put my grubby little hands all over the chicken nuggets too.
@Christy – Now that Mike is famous we should start a celeb gossip blog about Mike. I will call in the paparazzi and they can try to get some pics of Mike scandalously eating chicken nuggets.
Stupid fly! Doesn’t he know you don’t mess with another man’s nuggets? Geesh!
One man’s nuggets is another fly’s erm lunch ..
Kamikaze Flies have to eat too man… :)
…. but they should only get the leftovers.
/I hate flies. I really really hate flies.
One more thing Mike… I think you need to purchase one of my Insect Killers. That will get rid of those pesky flies…hehe
I also have some ocean front property in Arizona, a couple of sky hooks, and a nice pair of board stretchers… you know, if your interested…heh
@Danielle: I don’t think anyone wants to see me eating nuggets. It’s not a pretty sight. I’m a messy eater :P
@Mark + Baron: Surely there’s someone we could pay to handle flies when we all become a-listers, right? :P
@Bucky: A board stretcher sounds pretty interesting…lol ;P
@Mike: I’m on it! [goes off to craigslist...]
And you didnt share? I mean you named him(If kamikazi can be taken as a name)afterall…
;)
So here’s what I do, I take a spatula(sp) and staple a postcard around it. … Instant fly swatter. Then I chase the fly around trying to hit it the ground where it is them promptly DESTROYED.
Mike in all seriousness, congratulations! It takes a lot of work to get to the top 10k and it’s not something everyone can do. I know you like to portray it as mostly luck, but you’ve put a lot of effort (and hours) into your blog. I hope you will write some kind of blog post congratulating yourself on your efforts!!! Answering all these comments alone is a job within itself! (I knew you would do awesome…I just knew it!) :) This is a really big deal you know!!!! (Gigantic Hug)
On a not so serious note…Danielle….good idea. Now that he’s famous we’ll use our friendship with him to get the inside scoop and then sell all his secrets to the Enquirer. This way if I don’t make A-Lister I’ll still be able to make some extra cash, lol. (You’re hilarious Danielle!)
Heck if we’re paying people to play golf for us, we might as well get our own bug busters too.
You know, we should make a list of profiles on this little group of bloggers. You guys are going to breathe much needed life to the A-list when you get there :D
@Jodi: I share my nuggets with no one :lol:
@Bush: Hahaha…that sounds like something you’d hear Jeff Foxworthy joking about. “You might be a redneck if you make flyswatters from spatulas.” I’d do it :D
@Christy: Thank you, Christy :) I’ll think about making a post a little later. I don’t really feel any different though being in the top 10k…hehe.
@Baron: Heck yes, we’re all going to make the A-list something worth aspiring for…hehe :P BTW, I just looked up aspiring on dictionary.com to make sure I was using it properly :lol:
@Christy – Oh but I was totally serious – that Perez Hilton guy gets to eat in fancy restaurants with movie stars – and that could be us Christy and the inside scoop on Mike the blogebrity could be our ticket! :P
@Mike – You wanna see ugly – gimme a burrito then we will talk messy. You have met your match with the messy Mike. Condiments are the bane of my existence!
I think it’s impossible for anyone to eat a burrito without wearing most of it :P
Yeah – I suppose most people will get some burrito on them – but do they come out Taco Bell looking like they just a burrito shower? I don’t think so. I once ate a hot dog while walking on got ketchup and mustard on my shirt, my skirt, my shoes and my purse. Come to think of it… at work today I was eating dill pickle chips and I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and what did I see you ask?… I had a small piece of potato chip stuck to my forehead!!! And must I regale you again with my infamous eating chocolate in bed fiasco? I actually refuse to eat both chicken wings and ribs on the basis that it is too embarrassing.
Trust me Mike, you have met your messy match!
LOL Can’t…stop…laughing! LOL
@Danielle: oh Danielle, you’re too much! A potato chip on your forehead? Can’t figure that one out, except maybe your first mistake was to be eating dill pickle chips in the first place — yuck! :P Would love to hear the chocolate in bed thing, but I think I should probably plan for that as I suspect heavy laughter would ensue.
Oh, and about that mustard on your shirt, purse, skirt and shoes…ugh, tell me about it sister! I hate it when that happens. :)
The chocolate in bed story has already been released to the public – come to think of it – it’s here on Mike’s blog… but I can’t remember where exactly. Oh yeah! It’s in one of the posts about BlogsWeLuv… I think?
What I don’t understand about the chip on my forehead is: Why didn’t anyone notice? And tell me about it?
Yeah – I guess me eating is pretty funny. :D I know I laugh at myself as I clean myself up! You can dress me up, take me out, but don’t expect me to stay clean!!!
@Danielle: Hahaha…The next time you end up with a potato chip on your forehead you really need to take photos of that. That’s too priceless to not share with the rest of the world :lol:
@Mark: So how long have you been wearing skirts and carrying a purse? :P